A poem I wrote for a proposed collaboration for a pillow book with Marcelle Hanselaar – an artist whose work i’m obsessed with

the dog paces outside the door

(but it’s not the dog i want. tried it once – paws on my back made me bleed)
my sweat soiled sheets
pulled up, pulled over

I CRY BUT I DON’T KNOW WHY

i want, but i don’t know who
i don’t care who any more
i just want.

you don’t have to stay, you just have to do,
then you can go go go

my legs twitch & itch, my fingers scratch and pull,
the clock strikes three, three fifteen will be next
& i’ll still be alone, alone when i sleep, alone when i awake